I know I’ve written before about schools banning hugging. And you know what? I didn’t think I’d have to do it again. But here I am, once again forced to tackle the burning issue of hugging in our schools.
It seems a school in Connecticut, in response to some particularly violent physical contact, has banned all forms of physical contact in school. Though not explicitly stated in the policy, the implication is that even innocent forms of physical contact – a high-five or a pat on the shoulder or (god forbid) a hug – are banned and those who engage in such physical contact could be disciplined and perhaps even expelled.
For the record, I’m not totally against policies limiting physical contact in schools. Nobody wants their hallways clogged up by hormonal teenagers with their tongues down each other’s throats. And obviously, any sort of touching of personal areas is right out (besides, kids who want to grope each other will go under the bleachers to do it). Inflicting physical harm, wrestling, punching, kicking, and other physically harmful behaviors should also be prohibited.
If I’m not mistaken, a popular greeting that today’s youth enjoy engaging in is the so-called “high-five.” For those who don’t know, it involves two people raising their hands in the air and slapping their palms together momentarily. This “high-five” is also a popular celebratory and congratulatory gesture, both among the general populace and among those who participate in extracurricular sporting activities.
And then of course we have the hug: a simple gesture that involves two or more people wrapping their arms around each other. I don’t know anyone who doesn’t enjoy a good hug. It is a perfect way to express both platonic and romantic affection, and so it is one of the most versatile greetings.
The hug has a more masculine cousin, known colloquially as “man-love.” This gesture allows two gentlemen to express their feelings for each other without sacrificing any masculinity. The gesture involves two gentlemen facing each other. They each extend a hand, but instead of a traditional handshake, the gentlemen pull each other close and turn sideways until either their left or right shoulders touch, depending on which hand they extend. They then slap each other’s backs with their free hands in a masculine fashion.
Under this school’s policy, all such gestures are banned, though none do any harm. If the school is concerned about physical violence, why not simply crack down on fighting? Why is the complete and total elimination of physical contact the only solution?
And of course, the other question is how will the school enforce the policy? Will two students who high-five in the hallways get suspended? Could two friends who hug each other get expelled? Could a little man-love result in a detention? And what about the athletes? In addition to various forms of hugging, man-loving and high-fiving, athletes also tend to pat each other’s posteriors as a gesture of congratulations or encouragement. Will such gestures forever be banned from the sporting fields of this Connecticut school?
You see? The policy is ridiculous. If the school wants to keep kids from getting beaten up, they should give harsher punishments to kids who fight (and especially harsh punishments to those who instigate fights). But banning all physical contact isn’t the answer.
2 Comments
March 30, 2009 at 9:41 pm
We’ve become so detached and clinical as a society already. They have it backwards, they should have mandatory hugging, that’d make the world a better place!!
(((((Billy)))))
March 31, 2009 at 8:49 am
Mandatory hugging would be awesome. I tell you, the things this world comes up with these days.